Separation & Divorce
4. Separation
Authors: Staff Legal Eagle
Firm / Chambers:
Last updated: 16 Sep 2015
- A separation happens when your relationship has come to an end and a decision is made to separate from each other.
- You need to:
- make the decision to separate;
- clearly communicate that decision to your partner; and
- stop living together as a couple in a relationship even if you are still under one roof.
- In some cases one party may decide to leave the relationship. The other may not want the relationship to end but will eventually need to accept this decision. Counselling support may help with this.
- Regardless of who makes the decision to end the relationship it is a good idea to record the date in writing in case there is a dispute down the track. You can do this by email, text message or in handwriting.
- If you are in a difficult or violent relationship you need to make sure you are safe before you tell your partner you want to end the relationship. Each case is different but it is most important to ensure you and your children are safe. Statistics show that women and children are most at risk of being seriously injured or killed as a result of family violence around the time of separation.
- Sometimes you and your ex-partner will need to stay living under the same roof even after you have separated for practical reasons. You can stop living together as a couple but continue to live under the same roof.
- If the court needs to assess when you separated it will consider all the facts including the following:
- whether sleeping arrangements have changed such as sleeping in separate rooms;
- whether intimacy ended from the date of separation;
- whether socialising as a couple has ended;
- whether finances and bank accounts have been separated; and
- whether responsibility for domestic duties such as cooking, washing and cleaning are taken on by each individual in the household rather than one person attending to the needs of the other person as you would expect with a couple.
- If you have children under 18 years old the court will require you to participate in family dispute resolution (FDR) which is a specialised form of mediation before it will allow you to commence family law proceedings. Even if you have no children you may find FDR helpful as it will provide a forum where you and your ex-partner can make your own decisions about your family's future rather than having those decisions made for you by a judge or magistrate.
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