Answer by Michelle Whitehead, Camden 2570 NSW

• The first thing you should do is make contact with the Domestic Violence Liaison Officer through your local police station. They can conduct an audit of your home and assist you with safety planning advice.
• You will want to obtain legal advice if you have not already done so and consider taking out an ADVO against your ex-husband. If you cannot afford a lawyer there are Women’s Legal Centres all around Australia that can assist you.
• You should take a good look around your home and consider safety issues such as:
  • lockable security screens on doors and windows;
  • installation of security alarms or cameras;
  • making sure there is good outdoor lighting and trimming back bushes that someone could hide behind;
  • consider purchasing a dog;
  • make friends with your neighbours, tell them about your concerns and show them a photograph of your ex-husband; and
  • get into the habit of parking your car on the street facing the direction of the nearest police station in case you need to make a quick get-away.
• Before you go back to work you will need to:
  • talk to your employer and see what assistance they can give for maintaining your safety. This may include:
    • screening your calls;
    • screening visitors; and
    • providing you with a designated parking spot in a secure area;
  • talk to your co-workers and ensure they know not to disclose any information to your ex-husband if he should make contact with them; and
  • think seriously about whether you can return to your job in safety or if it would be better to look for alternative employment. This will depend on:
    • the severity of the violence in your relationship;
    • the likelihood of your ex-husband engaging in stalking behaviour;
    • the security of your workplace;
    • the availability of alternative work; and
    • other factors personal to you.
• You will also need to consider your internet and phone security by:
  • changing your phone number;
  • changing the login to your email, facebook and social media accounts;
  • ensuring that you have turned off any ‘find my phone’ apps and cloud storage of photographs; and
  • you may also want to download an app called Aurora developed by the NSW government for domestic violence victims. This app can be set up to automatically call the police or a friend and text them your location. It also contains a lot of useful information about domestic violence. You can download the app here: http://www.women.nsw.gov.au/violence_prevention/domestic_and_family_violence_app.
• Finally it is also very important to think about your finances. You will want to make sure that:
  • any joint bank accounts that you share with your ex-husband are either closed or frozen by the bank. You should call your bank to tell them that you have separated and withdraw any money that you are entitled to;
  • open a new account in your own name preferably with a different bank;
  • speak to a Centrelink social worker and get financial assistance to keep you going until you return to work. Make sure your Centrelink payments will be paid into your new account;
  • write to your bank and cancel any additional cards on your credit account. If you are struggling to meet a credit card debt you should call the financial institution and discuss your options with them;
  • disconnect any utilities (phone, electricity, water) that are in your name at your previous address as your ex-husband can reconnect them in his own name or if the bill are in your joint names you should call the service providers and explain that you have left the house and want to be taken off the bill; and
  • if there is a mortgage over your family home in both your names and you do not think your ex-husband will make the payments you need to speak to your lender and get immediate legal advice. You will also need urgent legal advice if you are worried that your ex-husband may sell the property or other assets.
• If you need more assistance with financial issues you can call the Credit & Debt Hotline for referral to a free financial counselling service on 1800 007 007.
• You can also consider contacting charities in your area who may assist you with emergency relief to help you get back on your feet.